Paranoia

Since I passed comment about my boss being an email pest he hasn't sent me any.

Not one.

I'm glad - but I'm also beginning to feel slightly paranoid...

So it's Friday again...

...And it's nearly two o'clock so things could be worse.

The wrong Kim

Tania just came bounding over to me from her desk...

"Kimmy, is this card from you? You spelt my name wrong - but thank you so much it's lovely!"

I looked at her blankly. Half asleep, I didn't know what she was on about.

"It's not from you?" she asked, visibly confused.

"Nope" I said, still not totally sure what she was talking about.

"But it says 'from Kim' on it"

"Yeah?" I said.

"Oooooh, it's from Kim" she realised.

"Yes, Kim" I said "and that's not me, remember?".

Made me laugh!

Coconut milk

I decided, while eating my dinner last night, that my task for the day would be to research how coconut milk can be used as a substitute for a blood transfusion. It was the by product of a random conversation - I think.

I've Googled it and I can see references to it, but I can't see any sites that want to give me the full low down and I'm starting to get a bit frustrated. I know that I don't exactly have anything better to be doing, but I had wanted to see some fascinating facts and I don't appear to be able to find any. I have seen how to actually do a coconut milk tranfusion (although they call it coconut 'water' and that it comes from the 'meat' so I'm slightly dubious as to whether we are talking about the same thing...) Anyway, you place the tube in the coconut 'eye' (they have eyes apparently) and feed it into the injured person's arm... Clever, but I wouldn't necessarily recommend it.

Now I'm torn, more researching of coconut milk, or looking at something else that is possibly more useful. I definitely can't read any more news because that is all I did this morning. BBC News, Sky News, The Times, The Guardian, BBC News, Sky News, The Times, The Guardian, BBC News Sky News, The Times, The Guardian...

Well, nearly wasted 15 minutes writing this... That's something I suppose.

Late lunch

I took a late lunch today so I have only just come back. I'm leaving at 5pm today (because I don't really feel like staying until 5:30pm) which means I only have one hour and forty-five minutes left! Woo hoo!

Comments

If you haven't had a look at the comments on "The lift is stuck..." have a look . They're funny - even if I do say so myself!

Christmas Party Animals

I forgot to say... It was the Christmas party last night.

I didn't go.

When asked why I replied "oh, because I don't really like anyone here!"

My honesty was well received though, because I was telling one of the few people that I do actually like!

Anyway, kick off was at 7:30pm and a whole gaggle of ladies felt the need to leave the office at 3:30pm to go and get their hair done together. True.

On their way out the door one of the ladies described her outfit to the others:

"I'm wearing my silk trousers and a slinky sparkly top".

Silk trousers for a roller disco? Clever choice.

By all accounts it was a pretty sober affair. I've heard a few whisperings and have had a couple of people hanging around my desk hinting in my direction, attempting to prompt me to ask delving questions - which I haven't because I really don't care what happened, when, where, or who did what to who (or should that be who did what to whom?). No broken bones from the drunken rollerskating. Not even any minor injuries....

Silk trousers still in tact as far as latest reports suggest.

Another day...

...Another present! Yay!

Can't be bothered

I can't be bothered to do nothing for the next two and a half hours.

Although it may sound strange, doing nothing is actually incredibly tiring.

Being restricted to bed rest must be knackering! Probably more fun though...

The lift is stuck...

...And I can tell that the person in there is panicking because I can hear the alarm bell. It started off as a quick ring, was then being held down for slightly longer, and now it's ringing for at least 20 seconds at a time!

That's what I would be like.

By the time I was rescued, if still conscious, I would be in floods of tears and would probably have wet myself...

I'm very afraid of getting stuck in a lift.

I think I suffer from mild claustrophobia - but it turns extreme pretty quickly!

Too many emails

Before I met this brand new boss of mine I thought that he sent too many emails.

Now I know he does and it's really starting to get on my nerves.

The other day, I thought all his stupid questions were just a bid to get to know me, and I played along.

Now I don't know what the point of all these emails are... But I really feel like saying "don't you have any work you should be doing?!" although I guess this wouldn't have much impact coming from me!

Today he's tried to draw me into an email conversation. I've sarcastically replied eight times now but I purposely haven't asked him any questions so that he doesn't have to reply, and yet he has. Over and over again... Grrrrrr...

I would like him to leave me alone now!

Pleeeeeaaaasssseeeeee!

I think I am already starting to prefer my old boss whom I never saw or heard from!!

For now I will take it that he is just being friendly and I'll quietly hope and pray that the emails stop...

I really hope it does stop or I'll have a new thing to moan about... Allen and the bare basics of this job have enough moaning potential for anyone, a new moaning subject is definitely not called for!

New boss verdict?

I'm not sure.

My new boss is a 'regular nice guy'. He seemed very up beat and wanted to have a laugh and a joke... Some of which weren't at all funny, but he was trying at least and that didn't go un-noticed!

Luckily for me, he knows quite a few people who work in this office as he has worked in various locations for this great company. I say 'luckily', because it meant that he knew who all the 'tricky' (to put it nicely) people were. He seemed to hate them all for one reason of another, making comments about them that I probably shouldn't repeat! It made me laugh actually, because it just goes to show that those kind of people never change!

So, here is a summary of (what can only loosely be termed) the 'meeting':

1) We discussed, and agreed, on the people that we hate.

2) I told him about the man that shouted at me and he said he needs to discipline him anyway so asked me to put all the facts in writing to him. I haven't started constructing that email yet, but when it's completed it's sure to be a masterpiece!

3) I confessed that I don't do anything at work... Ever!

He laughed.

It took about an hour to get through just that, I don't think that anything was achieved, but it somehow seemed quite constructive - which is odd!

In an attempt to convey an air of professionalism, he was talking about how he would like to introduce an automated booking system for the meeting rooms that we have here...

...Then he realised that if he took that away from me I really would have nothing to do, so he decided that it would be best if we stuck to the manual way instead! I did tell him that I just leave the book open on my desk and allow everyone to book the meetings themselves as I have lost the will to do anything anymore - and filling the book in myself now seems like an inconvenience... But he said that despite that, it does atleast give the impression that I do something uselful!!

He also said that he had seen my CV and could not understand why I am doing this job. Which is strangely nice to hear.

Why am I doing this job again?

At least I won't have to feel bad when I hand my notice in next month. Seems like my new boss understands where I am coming from, so I'm quite happy about that...

Final verdict? Seems ok.

Pass the parcel

I have successfully passed my unwanted present on and the cleaner is very happy with her new diary and calendar!

Christmas presents I forgot to mention...

I have also been given a diary and calendar...

...But they are horribly branded and have a 'motivational work ethic' or 'phrase of wisdom' at the bottom of each page.

I am going to try and give them away.

(If I can't I will have to bin them, but for some reason I quite feel bad about that!)

Christmas presents

I'm doing ok this year so far...

Monday = Wine and chocolates

Tuesday = Box of chocolates

Wednesday (so far, it's only 9:05) = Big box of chocolates

This may be a rubbish place to work but they sure are generous with their Christmas confectionery!

Right in the middle...

Just my luck.

Yesterday afternoon at about quarter past four, with still no sign of my new boss, I started writing the following post.

Title: Sicky feeling.

Post: I am actually so bored I am starting to feel sick.

Because I was, and I did.

Unfortunately, before I got to publish it I heard loud (jovial) talking just outside the door - one voice I recognised well and one that I didn't. The one that I instantly recognised was the lady that did this 'job' before me, she's nice and generally a bit loud... The voice that I didn't recognise was my new boss! As they walked through the door I was clicking furiously to get rid of what was on my screen while looking at them, smiling, trying to converse and pretending to give them my full attention! It didn't work, because every time I tried to close the window I was given a second chance of whether I was sure, whether I was sure I was sure, that I wanted to close without saving... I kept clicking no (because I wasn't reading it properly) while the incriminating evidence remained like a beacon on the screen!

Needless to say, by the time I had managed to get it back onto BBC News (far more suitable I thought) I was mighty flustered!

I think I got away with it though...

Just!

Getting together with my new boss went well (more of that in a moment), but I nearly got caught for a second time when he thought he was doing the decent thing by showing me how to clear my internet history. Why? Am I really that unlucky? He came over to my desk and started tinkering on my PC. Nervous, obviously, I told him over and over that I knew how to do it already (because I do, now that one of the PA's happened upon my blog and advised me it would be a wise thing to do!) - but he kept on regardless. I was sitting here, full of dread, thinking 'all he has to do is look at the last page I was on and I will be well and truly busted'. At least there were no disparaging comments about him on there I suppose, although I still don't think that it would have made a very good first impression!

Anyway, i'm sure you'll be glad to hear he didn't look at what I had been doing with my afternoon (or every afternoon for that matter) and I got away with it!

Ha!

New boss update

It's gone half past one and my new boss has still not materialised...

Perhaps he is going to be as non-existent as the one he has just replaced!

Suits me.

New Boss

My new boss is coming to meet me this morning.

That'll be nice!

Tania's back!

Tania's back, yippie!!! (Three exclamation marks are definitely required here!)

Although she sits around the corner so I don't see her much, Tania has returned from her back packing jaunt to Asia (she's been away for a month) and this little addition to my day really makes all the difference... Partly because she makes me laugh, and partly because I can talk to her about the whole Kim thing. She understands and she finds it funny!

She was standing at my desk this morning, asking me questions, making sure that she said 'Amy' loudly at the end of each one. She was conducting this little exercise because Allen's door was wide open and she was attempting to get across the idea that my name is Amy, without actually telling him...

...He obviously heard because he got up from his desk in a huff and slammed the door shut!

However, he clearly chose to take no notice of the content of the loud conversation, as he just this minute came over to say "I am glad to see you back Kim, it's nice to see you", to which I replied "Oh! Nice to see you too"... (Idiot)

Nice indeed...

Kim indeed...

Silly man!

But Tania's back, yay!

Ah, I'm back!...

Two short days turned into five long ones, but I vowed to myself that I would return and now I am back!

Two days away from the office makes it doubly hard to come back to work. Five days away (plus the two lovely weekends at either end) made it almost impossible this morning!

However, I arrived today to find two Christmas presents on my desk (nice ones too, not a dead pigeon like my cat gave me yesterday), so it's actually turning out to be ok!...

...All that, I am sure, is about to change....